When I'm no Longer Here
by SanityLost2
Summary: Spike has just woken up from his hundred year sleep and realized that none of his friends are around anymore. However, a letter from his wife Rarity, gifts from his friends and a poem from Twilight Sparkle helps ease the pain of their loss.


Spike's heavily lidded eyes slowly opened. The world of color and sound of his dreams were washed away by brilliant sunlight. His groggy mind registered that he was laying on cold stone, and when he raised his head, his green eyes saw an entrance to a cave that he now lay in. Outside of the cave were several trees.

After a few seconds, reality hit him and he remembered where it was. Icy pain eked into his gut and started to gnaw at his insides. He'd just woken from the hundred-year sleep.

Memories of his past crashed against his mind, drowning him in a jumbled torrent. Pinkie, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity and Twilight were gone. Everypony was elderly by the time he chose to go to his sleep. He wanted to stay around for them until they departed, but he was getting sick. Twilight told him that if he did not go into the hundred year sleep soon, he would die. After several arguments, many tears, and hugs from all of his friends, he finally acquiesced to Twilight's wishes.

The going away party that Pinkie threw was one of the best parties he'd ever been to. But he still found it a little hard to dance and enjoy the music. The cakes didn't taste quite as sweet, even though they were delicious.

His stomach grumbled. Rolling on his side, he saw a pile of gems that held all of the different colors of the rainbow. Rarity had bequeathed them to him in her will. A heart shaped fire ruby set in a golden necklace rested on top made a knot form in his throat. It was the first gift he had ever given the pony who eventually became his wife, after her first, short lived marriage with Hoity Toity failed.

He had to get up and eat, but his muscles felt heavy. Acidic teeth chewed on his heart. Was there any point in getting up? He reached over and took hold of a rounded orange gem and placed it in his large muzzle. He chewed. Rich, exciting flavors danced on his tongue. He barely noticed.

With a heavy grunt, he managed to push himself up onto all fours. He stood on his hind legs and realized how far he was from the ground. When he went to sleep he was about five feet tall, but he must have doubled in size! With a purple scaled hand, he took a handful of gems and placed them into his mouth. His stomach closed around the nourishment.

With quivering fingers he took the necklace on top of the gem pile and set it aside. Squeezing his eyes shut, he dug his fingers into the hoard of gems and wildly pushed them into several directions, scattering them over the floor of the cave.

His insides were numb, his head spun. On the back of his lids visions of the past flashed, recalling joyous times that happened so long ago. A lifetime ago.

Once half of the gems had been scattered from the once neatly mounded pile, Spike collapsed on the floor, allowing tears to roll down his cheeks. He spent several moments in silent contemplation, seeing shining faces of the ponies that were no longer living. For a brief moment, he wondered whether all of those great times had happened or if it had all been a dream.

Through vision blurred by tears, he caught sight of a large ivory scroll case sticking out of what remained of the gem mound. Picking it up, he observed the golden caps at both ends. Turning it around, he saw the shapes of the cutie marks of all six of his friends, carved in to the case and painted in colored lacquer.

Spike slowly unscrewed one of the golden caps and tipped it over, watching a huge sheaf of rolled up paper fall to the ground. Unrolling them all, he read over the scroll on top.

_My Dearest Spike,_

_I cannot tell you how difficult this was for me to write, for I know that when you read it, I will be gone. I have been searching for the words to express how I feel, but, how shall I put it, the quill is not connected to my heart. Any words that I write feel shallow in comparison to the words we shared before you departed._

_I won't lie to you and say that I am doing fine, because I am not. The world is cold without you here, however the memories that we created together warm my heart. I imagine it is nothing compared to the pain you must feel. I wish I could be there to comfort you now, and hold you like I used to. _

_All of us are saddened by your departure, however Twilight and I are taking it the hardest. Although she won't say it outright, she felt like a big sister, and sometimes a mother, to you. _

_Although I am saddened that you are gone, in a way, it is for the best. Us mares are old now, and I would not have wanted you to see us die, especially me. The doctors told me that the cancer is getting worse, and it's only a matter of time before I start floating among the clouds._

_In this scroll case are letters that every Element of Harmony has written to you. All of us planned to just write you one letter, however, I think we each wrote at least ten. Isn't it funny how much you wished you could tell a loved one after they are gone? You think that you tell them everything just before they leave, and realize just after that there was something you forgot to say. That has happened with me several times since you left, which is why I wrote you more letters than the rest._

_All of the mares gave you something to remember them by, and placed it in the pile of gems. We would have just put it on top, but Pinkie Pie said to place it inside so it would be like a present. I placed my remembrance for you on top, Pinkie said it would be like a bow for the present. I chose to give you the fire ruby that you gave me close to 50 years ago. I could think of no better symbol of our love. Twilight and I placed a permanence spell on each item, so they won't be subject to decay. _

_I earnestly wish I had the words to express the joy I held in my heart, for all of the years we were together. Hopefully, all of my other letters will make up for what this one lacked. I wish you well in the new world you awaken to, and I hope that you will think of me from time to time._

_Your love, now and forever,_

_Rarity_

From time to time? Spike placed the papers on the gem pile and pressed his hands to his eyes. He'd think about her all of the time. Every hour, of every minute, of every day. She was his life, and even though she wasn't there now, she was still creating dresses, humming to herself as he dutifully helped her, in his heart and mind.

The dragon wiped his moist hands on his scales and shook away the grief. Slowly, he went through the remainder of the gem pile, thanking his lucky stars he hadn't destroyed his friends' last gifts in his sorrowful rage.

The first item he came to was a Stetson hat with an apple pendant tied around the brim, that had to be Applejack's. There was a drawing of the landscape he remembered seeing outside of Ponyville, filled with cute frolicking creatures. Three yellow butterflies were sketched in the lower right hand corner to show it was from Fluttershy. There was a Wonderbolt doll which was an effigy of Rainbow Dash. Sewn into the doll's wings were actual cyan feathers from the great flier herself. Pinkie's remembrance was a silver statue of a baby dragon, himself, holding up a cupcake while a pony, Pinkie Pie, hugged him. It was a reminder of the second birthday party Pinkie had thrown for him.

He dug through the rest of the gems, looking for Twilight's gift. When he reached the bottom of the pile, he thought that she had forgotten to give him something. Spike bit his tongue and looked to the side. That was when he saw a scroll case made of dark cherry wood, beneath a loose pile of gems that was tucked away in the corner. He walked over and gently picked it up, loosening the clasp and letting the two scrolls from it.

The first one he picked up was a short letter.

_Dear Spike,_

_The little poem I wrote that's on the other piece of parchment is my gift to you. I didn't know of any item that I could give you that would express how much I care for you, or how painful it was when you left us. So I wrote that. I hate being in the library, because you aren't there. My husband comforts me, and so do my children, and grandchildren, but it's not the same without you there. _

_I hope you like my gift. It's probably not the greatest, but hey, at least it isn't a book! I set my gift apart from the others so that you wouldn't accidentally eat it when you first wake from your sleep. Dragons get hungry when they wake up and, knowing your voracious appetite, you'll probably down that huge pile of gems in no time._

_I hope this poem, and the letters in that big scroll case, will be a comfort to you in times of need. I miss you Spike._

_Your best friend, sister, and sometimes mom,_

_Twilight Sparkle_

Spike took a deep breath held it for a few seconds, before reaching down and unrolling the second scroll.

_**When I'm no Longer Here by Twilight Sparkle**_

_Time can be a silly thing,_

_it tends to break things apart._

_Its eternal, iron fingers_

_can unravel powerful bonds._

_Or causes the unyielding unity_

_to slowly fade into nothing._

_But Mother Nature is clever,_

_and tricks old Father Time._

_She gathers the warmth in a soul,_

_when it flies to hereafter,_

_and hides it in her beautiful grace._

_So it can always be shared by two,_

_when only one remains._

_When you need a little smile_

_to brighten up your day_

_look up and see the blazing sun,_

_to see my brilliantly shining grin._

_When you need a hug,_

_let the sun's rays warm you_

_and feel my forelegs_

_around your shoulders._

_If you need a gentle nuzzle_

_feel the wind on your cheek,_

_my muzzle is invisibly hiding_

_in that soothing caress._

_When you are scared_

_and you can't sleep at night,_

_my lullabies will be sung_

_by birds serenading the stars._

_If the darkness is closing in,_

_and fright keeps you awake,_

_I'll turn on your nightlight,_

_and let moonbeams melt the shadows._

_Some days you may feel alone,_

_when I'm no longer here._

_But just look up then you'll know_

_I'm everywhere you'll ever be._

Spike blinked tears from his eyes. He gently rolled up both pieces of parchment and placed them back into the scroll case, laying it gently in a pile with the other items he'd received.

Despite everything, his heart was much lighter than it was before. Looking outside his cave, he saw the darkness rapidly encroaching in the night sky. Fatigue was pulling him downward.

Spike lay down and rested his head on folded arms, letting the memories of his wife, best friend, and the rest of the gang sooth the heaviness that remained. A few hours passed, and then a soft breeze blew across the dragon's cheeks. Nighttime songs of birds echoed throughout the night. Through heavily lidded eyes, he saw moonbeams wash over him, before slowly drifting to sleep.

**The End**

Author's Note: This story was inspired by a special person that I am about to lose soon. The person had a lot to do with the writer that I am today, and even though this slice of life story isn't great, hopefully it will honor their memory. This story was kind of a personal one, so I didn't have anyone proofread it. So, it's probably riddled with mistakes. I hope you can look past that and enjoy the story. For the few that read this story, I hope you are able to take its message with you everywhere you go. Loved ones are very special, and will always be with you, even if it's just in your heart.

I have to confess that I am a terrible poet. Whenever I write a poem, it's always the old fashioned stuff that I used to read when I was a little kid (like Robert Frost). Today's modern poetry boggles my mind. I hope you are still able to enjoy it anyway. Thank you so much for reading!


End file.
